Mommy’s Wine Time-out

Holy wow so many DM’s. But the main takeaway seems to be WTF THAT’S WRONG or FUCK NATURAL WINE but there’s bigger points: First: SHE’S A SOMM. She (presumably–if the accrediting agencies have done their job), knows better. Using her wine education in a deal with the devil. Just like most of the somms on IG and TW do. Second, you only need to spend a few minutes around the wine pros and bloggers on IG and TW to realize there is a HUGE demo for this marketing & the kind of wine she’s selling. It is reverse-snobbery-ism: where everyone has had WINE IS TOO COMPLICATED and LET’S TAKE THE SNOBBERY OUT OF WINE shoved down their throats for the past 2 decades and the bar on wine-education gets lower and the category of ‘wine professional’ gets bigger creating an even dumber public as they follow these somm dumbshits. So she’s here to help–all while easing the needle in because I’m a somm and I’m here to help with both those things you’ll be fine darling, you can trust me because I’m cool and look like you–fun and wear weird glasses ALL THE WAY TO THE FUCKING BANK. And most of you have these followers. I read their comments. This is what I mean when I say, “I can tell who you are by your follower’s comments.” Because you have bought into this low bar and continue to bring the education down to the people instead of making them come up to you. This woman is no worse than some of the ‘facts’ about wine I read on social media every day from alleged authorities & hired pens & millennial darlings in cute dresses with genX versions trying desperately to keep up the pose game. Fact is: you HAVE to dumb it down. You HAVE to make it smiley & fun & blend in health & happiness & freedom & lifestyle in order to get the almighty engagement. You HAVE to market to the lowest common denominator. Wineries know this. They will insist they are serious and not interested in fluff, all while arranging photo-shoots with the gaping-mouth It’s wine-o’clock somewhere and Time spent in the vineyards is the best time and NO ONE WANTS A SMALL GLASS OF WINE crowd. Y’all should be ashamed of yourselves for what you’ve created here. This woman is not the problem. She’s just a scab on the huge oozing wound that’s fun to pick at.

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