No Hope

IMG_20160824_222245Thin brown amber with yellow edges.  Looks like a 15 year-old Pinot.  Smells like a 15 year-old 5 dollar pinot that’s been hanging out its whole life on the top shelf of a liquor store in Bakersfield.  Effusive burnt fruit, electrical fire, commercial carpet, diaper-pail and bad hippie tea spiked with stevia and barley-malt.  Nose like a Mr. Pibb left out in the sun for a week, but still managing to pack a bit of heat.  Alcohol on this HAS to be North of 15.  Miserably oxidized, reeking of prune juice and truck-stop restroom–gee I can’t WAIT to taste it.

Fiveyear-old Grenache that is gone?  Really Paso?  How embarrassing.  The rest of the world makes Grenache half this price in their SLEEP that will last twice as long.  Hi-AL wines don’t age. Period. End of conversation.  A wine like this would be fun to review upon release.  Maybe I’ll go find a fresh one tomorrow.  I PROMISE everything contributing to this bottle’s downfall is readily apparent in a new release.  And don’t give me that whole “2011 Paso was a bad vintage” whiny bullshit.  If you can’t make Grenache in California which can’t last 5 years, you need to find a new hobby.

In the mouth, burn. Like chewing on the dash of your car.  Popcorn.  Fairbanks White Port.  The artificial shredded-tire bullshit they put in playgrounds for the helpless enabled dirt-allergic children of people who drink wines like this.  Watery alcohol with herbaceous burn.  Cayenne pepper stirred into 7-UP. Finish like pancake syrup.  Congratulations Paso, this is the worst wine I have had in MONTHS. No, this YEAR.  Handily.

2011 AUSTIN HOPE Grenache Hope Family Vineyard Paso Robles 15.0

One thought on “No Hope

  1. Holy COW do I love this review! Haven’t ever tried a single one of their wines, but I feel as though I just woke up, hungover, from a long night in their library with someone I don’t know.

    Well, well done!


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