Grave Digger

Staining impenetrable black with a thin dark-ruby edge. An overbearing stench rises up out of it even as it is being poured–some distance from your face. Sickening floral parts briefly to allow a chemically structure element glimpses from behind the blinds of tooth-achingly sweet oil and honey emulsification with massive shards of oak jutting out of the nauseatingly obese flesh like gratuitous OSHA gore.

Do I have to taste this wine? Please dear Dog don’t make me taste this wine. WTF is this??? The over-done fruit on it approaches vegetal and compost in its purely rotten form, not spicy and alive like something excitingly vegetal or compellingly earthy. This is a putrid sugar swamp.

In the mouth–if you can separate the mouth from the nose–it’s actually not as bad as it smells. Basically devoid of fruit. Oh there’s concentration and maceration and reduction and oak and sugar and everything like that–things that play “huge luscious dark black fruit” for the tech-sheets and the tour-buses and bling-bros–but no actual fruit. Oh god I just smelled it again. Now I see why #influencer and club-member with the *housewife grip* never smell their wine. I wouldn’t either. It smells like Ben & Jerry’s made a flavor called Chemical-Factory S’mores. But back to the taste: The flabby banana-peel essence is crashed slightly before mid-palate by a wall of bitterness. I know ‘bitterness’ isn’t a real wine-descriptor–it’s a cop-out and sounds like a girl describing a beer–but this isn’t real wine and I’m not wasting any more of my–or your–brain cells on it. And it is just flat out unpleasantly bitter–and massively so–shortly after take-off and worsening dramatically until the wee finish of acetylene torch on your uvula.

2014 DENNER VINEYARDS Syrah Willow Creek District Paso Robles 14.8

4 thoughts on “Grave Digger

  1. Not sure I ever felt THAT strongly about lousy Paso Syrah, but I am with you… these over-ripe, over-the-top Paso Syrahs are getting old. We were introduced to some good juice when Paso was young in labels like Saxum, Epoch Estate and Linne Calodo… but something went seriously wrong along the way. I tasted a Booker recently… like this Denner, it was over-ripe and sweet! These are wineries with good history, going down a strange path. The prevalence of this stewed fruit and 16-17% alcohol has to be reaching the limit of demand for these kind of wines. Although, you haven’t tasted horrible wine until you have tried the indigenous, non-vinifera junk they drink in the East, like Concord & Catawba!

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